My Holiday Wish List 2014

Well daaaahlings, it’s that time of year again… goodie time! Yeah I know, it’s supposed to be all about love and family and all that good stuff, but come on, show me someone who doesn’t like a nice present once in a while. Wether you celebrate any of the season’s holidays or not, we all deserve to treat ourselves well. Nobody should ever have to justify buying themselves or a loved one something special, even if it’s a little over the top. Life is too short. If something can make you happy, and you can afford it, what are you waiting for? I mean, it’s not like we take our money into the grave with us, right?

So, obviously you are just dying to know what is on my list. I thought I’d make it easy for you. Here is my holiday wish list for 2014.

Untitled

1. The thing I want most in the world is something that can’t be bought (if only it were that easy). I want a man who is worthy of me. I want him to love me without measure. I want him to be educated, intelligent, generous and kind. I sometimes wonder if he is out there. My heart tells me that God didn’t bring me this far only to leave me without the thing I want the most. Despite what I’ve been through, I still hold myself in high regard, I know my worth, and I’m not going to run after the first man who crosses my path. I know what I want, and I won’t settle for anything less, not ever.

Go big or go home, I need the 15 inches. I'm tired of little weenies (aka Dr ManWhore).
Go big or go home, I need the 15 inches. I don’t like  little weenies (Dr ManWhore’s penis was proof of that).

2. …but if I can’t have a man, I’d like an Apple MacBook Pro LOL. I miss my lovely iMac. I left it behind when I left England. Normally I love a nice big desk top computer, but my life is transient at the moment. I may end up moving around a bit until I can get settled, so I think a laptop would better suit my lifestyle right now. I want the 15 inch one. When it comes to screen size, size definitely matters.

Mmmm... I just want to lick it!
Mmmm… I just want to lick it!

3. Let’s also throw in something that has been on my gift list for several years now: a Parentesi cocktail ring with green quartz and pavé diamonds by Bvlgari. According to D.H. Lawrence, “A woman unsatisfied must have luxuries, but a woman who loves a man would sleep on a board.” From this quote, you may be able to infer why I feel like I need a big F’ing gobstopper like this one. Vulgar? Perhaps. Fabulous? Abso-freaking-lutely.

As you can see, I don’t ask for much ;). You have seven shopping days to make my wishes come true. I hope you signed up for overtime!

So, what is on your list this year? Whatever it is, I wish you all the joys in the world. Holiday kisses to all of you!

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