Skulking on Hollow-ween

Sometimes my mind drifts into places I don’t want it to go. Nothing particularly horrible happened, but my feelings seemed to have taken a bit of a  dive. I’m a teeny bit embarrassed to talk about it after I seemed to make it look like I had found some kind of enlightenment, but I will give you a hint: boys. I don’t really want to talk about it because the more you focus on something, the more power you give it.

I’m skuliking LOL.

I was being so good. I was storing little baubles of happiness in the same way that a squirrel saves nuts for the winter. I was feeling good. But then I had a teeny little hiccup. I slipped and the baubles scattered. It happens. Nobody changes overnight I guess. We have to be kind to ourselves. Rome wasn’t built in a day, after all. We are all works in progress.

Many years ago, I think it was on Oprah or Dr Phil, there was a show I watched about weight loss. They were discussing how most of the people who lost weight gained it back. Do you know what makes the difference between successful dieters who keep it off, and those who regain the pounds? Every single one of them suffered from slip ups, even the ones who were considered successful. The difference is, the successful dieters were quicker to get back on when they fell off the wagon.  It’s not a great secret or a magic pill, but this concept can be applied to anything. It is an idea that stuck with me.

The problem is, when you are feeling low, it’s not always so easy to get the happiness momentum flowing again. Your mind isn’t really receptive to happy thoughts when you feel like crap. I need to stop telling myself that I am unloveable, that nobody will ever love me. I need some heavy ammunition.

I took the day off today. I needed it. I ate lots of stuff that was bad for me (did you know that Nordstrom has a little cafe called EBar that does the most divinely flaky  rugelach?– yep, true). I did a little retail therapy — some cute sneakers and a lovely bathrobe (I am such an awesome bargain hunter by the way. It was a dove grey  Eberjay bathrobe. Originally it was $120, but I got it for $40)… it was a no go though. I mean, it was good for while it lasted, but as the evening drew closer, so did the dark feelings.

Aside from eating enough fat and sugar to put myself into a diabetic coma, here are a few things I like to do when I’m feeling a bit low:

  1. I’ve been going for walks. It’s the healthy thing to do. I’m trying to convince myself that I like doing it. I listen to music or some chatter on YouTube. It’s not bad.
  2. I take a scented bath.
  3. I try to fill myself with good, positive thoughts. It’s all about getting myself “in the zone.”
  4. Gratitude: I make it a big deal to appreciate the little things. I think this one is soooooo important. If there is one secret to my success, it would be gratitude. If you don’t already, try keeping a gratitude journal. It has done wonders for me.
  5. Anticipation. Always try to have plans in the works. It gives you something fun to focus on. If you are having a bad day, you can imagine where you will be or what you will be doing in a month from now. Right now I have a goal that by the new year I will have booked my next splendiferous adventure. Hint: copious amounts of food will be involved.

I think I’m going to eat my last Godiva macaroon now. It looks kind of  forlorn and somewhat lonesome.  I bet she is also wondering why no man will ever love her (okay, perhaps I am projecting now). I’ll go back on my diet tomorrow… maybe.

What do you do when you are in a downer?



  1. Thinking I do what you do, down to macaroons and chocolate/cinnamon/raisin rugelach. No, I’m not kidding 😘 A local baker makes the best I’ve ever had. Good/bad is that I have to special order pounds of it to get her to make it, but, I always have some in my freezer. Oh, and bubbly. Feeling the need for bubbly Rosé quite a bit lately, lol.

    I like that saying “feelings are like visitors…” Have to remember it!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. ——–Caroline,
    the only thing that brought me back to life is “GRATITUDE.”
    Realizing that I can give thanks for several things in my life”
    My kids. Husband. Words. God’s Promises. Cats. Tulips. Poetry.
    When I did not experience gratitude, this caused me to FALL and Die inside. x

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Write, I write. I also read, blob, sometimes I eat. Blob some more, try to negotiate with myself that I need to go for a walk, or run, usually failing to convince that bitch that I am right. Did I say I curl up and blob?

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Somebody needs a visit from…. ME! We leave Hawaii tomorrow and I am desperate for a new tropical adventure! 😉 We have been walking the beach, three miles, sometimes twice per day. Sunshine, ocean, palm trees, apparently that does it for me, and you have that!!! In 12 days I only had a couple itty bitty episodes of sadness (and of course I will need to write a blog entry about it 🙂 Oh, and I found this amazing shop in Kailua and purchased a dress and a necklace and some pillows and sheets for the beach house. So much fun!!! Back to real life tomorrow and of course my food log, get ready! I’m sure you have already bounced back by now because you are resilient! ❤

    Liked by 2 people

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