“Hey sexy,” and More Reasons Why I’m Single

Despite what everyone says about it (that it’s purely a hookup website), I tried Tinder for a while.  At first I thought it was pretty great. What I loved about the app is that people are only matched with those they are mutually attracted to. I was matched with many successful and attractive men. On paper, these men appear like amazing catches. The downside? For some reason Tinder seems to be a place where men  and women throw respect out the window. It is absolutely bizarre, and quite disturbing. Women are not even treated human beings, they are just sort of like animal flesh. It’s so ugly. I deleted my account today because I could feel myself starting to hate men. I don’t want to be like that. I know good men exist … just maybe not on Tinder.

Offenses range from the mild to the extreme, as I shall demonstrate here. Let’s start with an extreme case, shall we?? Unfortunately I don’t have full screenshots to prove this one, you will have to trust me. I wouldn’t make this stuff up. I present exhibit A(nthony).

Anthony.jpgHe then went on to ask me if I ever had sex with a family member. I shit you not. He revealed what I guess was supposed to be an absolutely scintilating morsel, but I think I vomited in my mouth a bit: apparently when he was younger (I don’t know what age “younger” is), he would sneak into his mom’s room in the dark and have sex with her. This was my first, and hopefully last, encounter with a true “motherfucker.” I replied, “okay, I don’t think we are a match.” I just didn’t know what else to say. I was kind of stunned. At that point HE blocked ME, because you know, I’m a freaking weirdo. And then the text thread disappeared –otherwise you know how I love my screenshots. Tinder ladies. Run as fast as your legs will carry you. 

And speaking of legs, are yours sexy? You better hope so!  So what if you have only two IQ points? According to this guy’s profile, he is a palliative care doctor which makes him really sensitive to humanity and appreciative of life and shit. 

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So according to a guy friend, my response to him was too extreme. When I showed the exchange to Crazy Kay, she was more offended than I was.  What do you think? This is very typical of what you find on Tinder. I felt very much like a cow being inspected at a market for my fat to muscle ratio, not like a human being.  It upset me. 

Here’s another conversation about a guy going off on how women who expect men to pay for a date are like prostitutes…

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Alright Captain Caveman, you become a special little fucktard right here on my blog. How do you like that one? And lucky you, this one is on the house!

The final guy is a very basic schmuck, but my last straw. He is a  civil trial lawyer. First of all, I absolutely can’t stand it when some guy I never met in person starts a conversation with “Hi sexy” …. I quite literally cringe. You don’t fucking know me like that buddy! Is that how you speak to strange women at the grocery store? Because you know me little better. I wondered whether to respond, and decided I would. Maybe I’m just really uptight.  I thought, okay he made a mistake, give the guy a chance.  Here is how that went…

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Again, men always asking me for more pictures … irritating. How about you try to get to know me instead? I mean you can see he isn’t really making much of an effort to understand who I am as a person.IMG_9073.jpg

I tried to be cute, but the truth is I was really pissed off. I left it there. And then I ruminated… and then ruminated some more.  Over an hour had passed, and in that time  I really became angry, furious actually. Why was I doing this? And then came my little rant. So you understand, it isn’t about this one guy in particular, was a culmination of all the dirsrespect (of which this post is only a sampling).

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And with that thoughtfully crafted response, delivered about eight hours later, I felt no regrets whatsoever. Moral of the story: if you want to keep your faith in humanity, do not open the Pandora’s box known as Tinder. Satan will find you there!!!!!

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27 Comments

  1. I matched with CJB on Tinder, and found my friend MC on there, too. I’ve met several nice guys from the site. I feel like location matters. Boys are much more respectful in general here in Maine. I’m very lucky.
    That said, those dudes are trash. Im sorry you had the experience you did. Try Bumble – boys are slightly better over there and girls have to initiate conversation.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Me too. Bumble feels safer. I actually have had good luck on OKCupid but I think that’s because it has some good sorting questions, I have identified a few key ones that make a person very incompatible for me: ‘is jealousy healthy in a relationship?’ (Me: if they say yes it’s a dealbreaker). ‘Would you rather be normal or weird’ (me: normal people always fail the test with me. )

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  2. What a bunch of weirdos! I wonder if these guys present as “normal” in their daily lives and then just turn into freakshows when they’re online, or if they’re this outwardly creepy and gross in daily life?

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Oh, GAAAAAAAAAAAG! At the rate they’re going, there will be no actual human women left on those sites in the very near future. I gave up on the online thing after being contacted by so many scammers on Match and Our Time – accurately identifying myself as a widow brought out all the twits who assume “widow” means “rich, vulnerable idiot.” AAAAAAAK.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Holy crap, this is disgusting. Total meat market. Seriously though, I wonder if they have any success rate with this kind of attitude? I think that’s a big concern if they do. I can’t imagine any self-respecting woman wanting to engage in a relationship with ‘men’ like these. I think the self-respecting women must be over on Bumble, haha!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think they must be getting positive feedback from women, otherwise why would they keep doing this? Maybe because they are desirable men (fairly handsome and successful) women will lower their standards for what these type of men will dish out? I’m not sure. But for me it’s totally not okay!
      Fourth suggestion for Bumble 😂

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      1. For the record, I’ve never used Bumble, but I was told it’s way better than Tinder. I once checked Tinder out and it did feel like a meat market.

        They totally must get positive feedback otherwise they would need to change their hunting strategy. That’s really really sad for me to process, that women lower their standards instead of finding men who meet higher standards. I guess we’re all different, but still. Sad world out there.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Bumble feels different. I wish they had a better pile of questions but yes, the idea that women can control the message is good. It also blurs pictures until you click on them so even if a turd sends a dick pic, you don’t have to see it- you can report him and move on, no garbage with seeing a peen you don’t want.

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  6. My sister is probably around your age and uses Bumble. I’ve met some of the guys she has found there on shared outings to concerts or festivals – they seem okay-ish. Granted, she doesn’t go into detail about any assh*les she’s encountered on Bumble in detail with me – if it was terrible like your experiences I am sure I would know by now. As her older brother I am glad she seems to do okay with it and is not jaded after a couple years on the app.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I am also slightly offended by these men. You weren’t off base and your answers weren’t over the top. When asked for a sexy pic maybe next time say, “You first”? Of course, who knows what crap you’ll get back. 😕

    Liked by 1 person

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