Recently I had a conversation with some random person who told me his ten commandments for life. I decided to come up with my own.
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Rule number one: Show up. If my life had a motto, this wold be it. I have used it to get me through many a tough time. Sometimes life is crazy and scary and completely out of control. Your just want to hide and hope it will go away. Take this magic little pill: just show up. You don’t kneed to know what to do or how to do it. Just put one foot in front of the other, and the path will reveal itself. I can’t tell you how many times  this has gotten me to where I needed to be.

Rule number two:  if it makes you happy, do it. Selfish? Maybe. Is that so bad to put yourself first? I’m not talking about doing something that is going to hurt someone. You are hopefully wise enough to distinguish right from wrong. I’m talking about following your bliss. Care about how you feel. If you don’t, who will?

Rule number three: Do what you can while you can with what you have. Tomorrow the money might not be there, the health might not be there, or the opportunity. The time is now. Don’t waste it. Tell the ones you love you love them while they are still around. Eat the donut(s). Do that thing. You know what I’m talking about: THAT thing. You will never live this moment again.

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Rule number four: Forgive. My dad always used to say, “forgive and forget.” Well I’m not Jesus, nor do I have Alzheimer’s, but I found that forgiveness is actually possible. Learning that was nothing short of a revelation for me. Sure forgiveness the most beautiful, amazing, life-altering, and soul lightening gift I have ever received. Bitterness is poison that only we taste, not the person we are mad it. If time and distance from your situation allows, do it (see rule #3).

I always thought that phrase, “forgiveness is the gift you give yourself,” was a bunch of crap. It’s not.

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Rule number five: Trust that the Universe is working in your favour, and everything is going to be okay. Better than okay my lovelies! There was a time when I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. I genuinely thought my life was over. Things were so bad that even if I could have whatever I wished for, my head wasn’t even capable of finding the wish that could right the wrongs. I don’t know how it happened exactly (I think it has a lot to do with rule number one), but I’m ok again. No, it’s not perfect, but it’s beautiful in its imperfection, and I am indeed okay. So will you be.

Number six: Be what you want. If you want love, give love. If you need peace, be a source of peace for someone else. If you need help, help someone. Try it. It will make you feel good in the process.

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Rule number seven: Show gratitude. Become aware of your many blessings. Train your brain to find the good. There will be days when this feels close to impossible, but there is always something. There is the warmth of the sun that shines on your skin, and your two eyes that open every morning. When you can appreciate those things that we often take for granted, life gets a lot sweeter. When you are aware of the good, the universe rewards you with more good.

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Number eight: Know that you are powerful. Yeah, it doesn’t always feel like it, but you are. You are the number one player in this story that is your life, and you decide how things go. Don’t make yourself small, the victim of unfortunate circumstances. Act when you feel inspired. You know what to do, deep down. Do it. Don’t let life just happen to you.

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Number nine: Embrace your weird. It’s okay to be different. The wold would be a pretty boring place if we were all the same. Let your weird light shine so that the other wierdos can find you. Wierd is a side effect of awesome.

Last but not least: Be kind. Sometimes that goodness you need isn’t there, but maybe, in some small way, we can give that goodness to someone else who needs it. I guess this is very much like #6, but it’s more focused on radiating good without the need of getting anything back. The world needs that. Even if you can only do that by giving a kind smile or by telling someone they look pretty today, be that person. You never know what kind of power a small kindness can have. Maybe your small light is the only light someone gets on a really bad day. I can’t tell you how many times a small act of kindness can ripple into something huge.

What about you? What would your rules be?

Things have been very even and quiet. Nothing monumentally exciting since my birthday post. These days, I’m happy to say, that although there are a few bored days, sad days have declined dramatically, which is completely awesome. Is it because I’m not stressing over any guys anymore? I wonder. As usual, I always try to find happiness where it’s available. I try to relish those those things and immerse myself in them as best I can . Here are some things making me happy at the moment…

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My MacBook Pro. This is my first post written from my very own computer. Although I have yet to get comfortable with all the features, I am loving my new laptop. I was told by a coworker (who used to work at Apple), that what I bought was way too sophisticated for my needs. Whatever dear, whatever. I like knowing that I have the best. It’s a big purchase, so I prefer knowing that by spending extra, I have future proofed my new toy. This little lovely ain’t goin’ nowhere. One of the coolest features is the little strip above the keyboard, the touch bar. Looks the freakin’ business even if I don’t know how to use it too well.

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Retail therapy: yeah, so on that note I do love spending a bit of money. When I’m down, my two go to’s are eating and retail therapy. I get that from my mom. Well hey, at least I’m not smoking crack with Satan, eh? I’m just ringing up charges at Anthropologie. They have some super cute stuff fright now. I got these adoreable chinos for work (which I’ve already worn), plus I bought a dress I liked. I’m waiting for it to arrive in the mail. I hope it fits right. Don’t ask me where I’m going to wear it, that’s irrelevant LOL. Originally it was $228 and I got it on sale for about $80. I adore the cute fish print.

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Rubios fish tacos: speaking of fish, I positively adore the fried fish tacos at Rubio’s. I’d say I’m becoming a regular. Yeah, it’s a chain, but what can I say, when it’s right, it’s right. The Fish Taco Especial? Sooooooooo right. I love the hot and crispy deep fried shell that surrounds the flaky pollock, I love the coolness of the avocado and the sauces they use. I love it how they make everything on the spot and everything is super fresh. Sure, grilled is healthier, and they do that too, but life is short. This is one of my go to’s when I am in need of a delicious treat meal. AND it’s cheap. These are $2 each on Taco Tuesday (though I usually save this for the weekend). These tacos are so much better than what I’ve had in much pricier restaurants. Get these tacos in your belly if this chain exists in your neck of the woods. These really are amazing!!!

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Nail Envy by OPI: I’ve never been one to really care about my nails. I’ve only gotten a manicure once in my life, and probably wouldn’t bother again. I keep my nails kind of short. I wear contact lenses, so it’s not really conducive for putting them in and taking them out. On occasions when I have tried to grow my nails, I haven’t been successful. They aren’t that strong and usually tear when I’m in the shower. Lately, however, I’ve been trying to focus a bit more on self care, and doing my fingernails and toenails is part of that. And you know what? This stuff actually works! It’s not terribly cheap ($18), but this product is definitely worth it. It gives a bit of shine, and my nails have never been stronger or healthier. I don’t intend to grow them long or paint them any colors (I’m not a fan of that look), but they do look very well groomed and kind of elegant. That makes me happy.

Yesterday I went to see Won’t You Be My Neighbor, a beautiful documentary about Fred Rodgers (aka Mr. Rogers), a man whose footsteps of love will echo into time. What an incredibly beautiful soul.  There is a saying I like, “The planet does not need more successful people. The planet desperately needs more peacemakers, healers, restorers, storytellers, and lovers of all kinds.” Mr. Rogers was all of those things. His message touched me deeply. I actually cried several times. Despite that,  watching this movie made my heart feel lighter. I was inspired, and I was encouraged by the simple goodness that we all have inside of us. I know we all want to appear all worldly and cool, but if you think of it, isn’t simplicity and love the highest form of sophistication? Isn’t it the paired down, minimalistic truth of what we supposed to be as humans? I think so. I leave you today with my favorite Mr. Rogers quotes. Reading them makes my heart feel giant, happy, and hopeful.

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Hurricane Irma passed us, and I am happy to say, that despite what it looks like on the news, and aside from some fallen trees, we are unscathed. In fact, here where I live, we did not experience one power outage. My biggest complaint about Irma was that I was completely and utterly bored. I tried to fill the time by filling myself up with little brain goodies (and belly goodies too LOL, there goes my awesome weight loss progress).

What are brain goodies you ask? Things that make me feel good on the inside, happy and empowering quotes and pictures, uplifting stuff on YouTube, cheerful songs, and I downloaded Gabrielle Bernstien’s Spirit Junkies on Audible. Going to listen to that after I finish this post. I am a hippie at heart. So maybe it does sound a little flaky fairy when I tell you I’m working on raising my vibration, but that’s exactly what I’m doing.

Below I have made a collage of just a few of my little brain goodies. It’s stuff I collected on Instagram and Pinterest. Just little snippets that I browse when I need a little pick me up. Chocolate cake works too.

Click any image to enlarge.

One thing I never wanted to be is a woman on her own with a cat: aka a “cat lady.” I positively loathe the idea. Cats just don’t do it for me. In fact, I don’t think I’m an animal person at all. That poses a little problem, because I really wanted to have a spirit animal LOL … don’t ask me where these ideas come from.

So what exactly is a spirit animal? According to urbandictionary.com, its supposed to be a “representation of your traits and skills that your are supposed to learn or have” (in animal form).

Cats, they certainly exhibit a particular beauty and mystery. They appear to have a certain sort of wisdom in their feline eyes – but despite that, I’ve never been able to really like them. I daresay (sorry cat lovelies) that their is something about them that I actually find somewhat off-putting. Now, before anyone gets too offended, I should say that if we were to go through the entire litany of Noah’s Ark, I don’t think there would be any one creature in the that represents who I am and who I want to be. Therefore, I nominate Cartman from South Park as my spirit animal.

I shall present my case:

“Screw you guys, I’m going home.”

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Cartman is smart enough when to cut his losses. When his devious motives don’t go according to plan, he curses his playmates and leaves the room. What better lesson could I possibly learn? Learning to leave when love is no longer being served is something I have really struggled with. Leaving with your head held high and your middle finger in the air– that’s the way to do it. Cartman is one classy dude, he leaves with a bit of style, and I admire that!

“Respect my authoritah!”

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Wether or not he deserves it, Cartman demands respect and will not tolerate anything else. I can not be beign to count how many times I have let others steamroller over me and put myself in inferior positions for one reason or another. Maybe I didn’t want to hurt someone’s feelings, maybe I just didn’t want to argue, or maybe it was a lack of confidence. It’s great to admit when you are wrong, but a person should have the courage of their own convictions to demand to be respected for their beliefs.

“What-eva! I’ll do what I want.”

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Another cool thing I admire about Cartman is that he doesn’t second guess himself. He does what he wants and doesn’t feel he needs to seek the approval of others. Yeah, I got to learn how to do that. I feel like I’m too old to worry about what other people think of me. Being a people pleaser all the time can really, as Cartman says, “suck ass.”

Telling it like it is

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OMG, this is like my favorite Cartman quote eva LOL! This one kind of speaks for itself. There is a saying, “speak the truth, even if your voice shakes.” Cartman does that in spades. I gotta say, the tears add that subtle special something. How can you not love this guy. He says it like it is. He says it without apology. He says it with a soupçon of drama. Yeah, he is the man!

But, my favorite thing about Cartman…

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He doesn’t take anyone’s shit. In my all time favorite episode of South Park, “Scott Tenorman Must Die,” Cartman exacts a revenge with such perfect execution of evil genius, I could have wept with glee. When Scott tries to pull one over on Cartman, Cartman devises a highly devious plan of revenge that ends with Scott crying some very rewarding “tears of unfathomable sadness.” Showing someone that you will not lie down when they are trying to take advantage of you can be f*cking sweet and highly empowering!

Perhaps, now that you know my choice for spirit animal, you might be thinking that Caroline is not the best role model out there LOL, but what-eva, I do what I want ;).

Have a great weekend my lovelies *smoochies*

So let’s see… when I last left off, I wasn’t in a good place. I’m happy to say that things are looking up. I have two job interviews lined up for Thursday. One of them I’m super excited about, but I don’t want to say anymore (maybe out of fear that I won’t get it?).  The other is a fairly decent sounding job in the financial industry– which seems a little boring but it’s a step up from what I’m doing now I think. Nevertheless, I am thrilled by the response I am getting. My resume is actually getting calls! That  is awesome, because when I first came to this country, I really struggled. I had been out of the workforce for over ten years, and nobody wanted to interview me. I need to go into my interviews psyched up and feeling good. This is when I turn to my Pintrest boards for some inspiration. The power of words have the most transcendent effect on me. Here are some new ones I’ve recently added to my collection.

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Tomorrow I’m off shopping for a killer interview outfit. I’m going to buy something fabulous (or as fabulous as suits get–I’m not really a suit person). I plan to go to these interviews looking and feeling the part.  I won’t lie, there’s this little gremlin who lives in the back of my head that fuels me with feelings of self doubt. It looks remarkably like Dr ManWhore. It’s fat and has a really loud voice, but I am going to do everything I can to kill that f*cker off. I have nothing to loose by trying to better my position, but I have lots to win. It is my greatest hope that my next post will contain some amazing news.

I hope the person interviewing me is a guy. I will smile a lot and make him fall in love with me a little. That’s one of the little aces up my sleeve, but other than that, any interview advice you have for me is greatly appreciated.